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Aug

28

MLM, Kids, Knowledge and Knowing

August 28, 2007 |

, coats, kids, mlm, network marketing, sahm, wahm

Ever given your kid a coat and made her wear it, because you knew the weather report? Ever insisted she wear it out the door, even though she didn’t want to, was already too hot, felt just fine without it?

I think every parent has probably done this, and most even think of it as the ‘right’ thing to do.

But what if it isn’t? What if by doing this and things like this all through our kids early years, we are depriving them of knowing? Of knowing things for themselves that they have experienced and felt and internalized because they lived it?

Often times I am in a hurry and have forced the coat issue, so don’t think I’m claiming not to have done this sort of thing, lol! But today, as I was washing the dishes from last night, (did I say last night? I meant the breakfast dishes, because everybody knows you don’t leave dirty dishes to sit over night!) I was thinking about autumn and cooler days coming.

Then I started thinking about the people in my children’s lives who have ingrained beliefs that if it is a certain temperature, that a child must wear a coat. And it occurred to me how ridiculous that is on many levels.

Sure it is easier to insist a child put on a coat than to have to carry it for them, so when they realize later that they do want it, it is available. Gosh darn it, we know they need so they ought to just believe us and wear it! We want to be efficient, and we know that they need the coat. So we insist and struggle and they are overcome because they are little and the coat gets put on.

And then off we all go to wherever, maybe on a less happy note than before the struggle but we are being good parents, right? And that’s what it takes sometimes, right?

But what if that isn’t what it takes to be a good parent? What if by insisting and forcing things we are depriving our children of true knowledge of why we have coats? What if we let the child go outside without their coat when they say they don’t think they need it? What if we trust their judgment and respect their right to choose what happens to their own body?

Then when they feel cold, they have a knowing of what that feels like and can ask for their coat from that place of knowing. Then instead of just being given factual knowledge that when it is such-and-such temperature outside, you need a coat, they have the knowing of needing the coat because they feel the desire for more warmth.

What is the difference?

The difference is that they lived an experience that taught them about temperature and physical discomfort and how to regain physical comfort. They used their own perceptions to reach a conclusion, and made their own choice about how to feel better, rather than had someone else’s conclusion and choice forced on them.

Why is this important?

Because it helps the child trust in themselves. In their ability to experience something and know what is right for them without anyone outside themselves giving them the answer. It instills confidence in their ability to know what is best for them. Many experiences like that translate into becoming self-aware, self-confident and self-reliant.

It may also keep them from being manipulated by others who may not have their best interests at heart. A child who is allowed to experience life and make choices based on first-hand knowing is a child who trusts that they know what is good for them, and wont be easily swayed to go against that knowing.

And sometimes they really don’t need the coat, even when we know they do, lol!

What do you have knowledge of in your MLM business because you have heard it from your successful upline, but lack a knowing of because you have never done it?

If you feel fear of doing something, just remember its only because you parents, like mine did me, forced you to wear a coat when you didn’t need one, so you began to rely on others instead of your own knowing.

A little tongue-in-cheek there, but in all honesty most of us don’t know what we are really capable of, in no small part because those around us - from parents and teachers to government and bosses - made and continue to make, so many decisions for us, without our input or consent.

Is there any hope for us? How do we reclaim our power? What if any impact does this common treatment of children in our society have on the 95% failure rate in MLM? Do we simply lack confidence for seemingly silly reasons like this and so don’t dare reach for what we really want?

What do you think?

~~~

Tracy Austin
www.TracyAustin.com
www.Organic-Foods-Mom.com

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